January 29th, 2016

So you had a shitty day, one worse than all the rest.

To try and help change that, I've prepared a pillow nest.

Get your softest pants on, and get all snuggled in,

Then our “make it better night” is ready to begin.

You can do what you wish, except die on the floor.

To get your mind off it, might I suggest some ps4?

I am here for anything, I can satisfy any needs,

A Pepsi, a beer, some dinner, or maybe a new bag of seeds.

All of this is optional, it’s all up to you.

Whatever you decide just remember, I love you.

January 19th, 2016

To Marcus, with love

This is a visual of my angriness towards you yesterday. 

You: "I like you"

I thought I'd be cheeky and fish for compliments with a "why?"

You responded by shrugging your shoulders and rolling over.

I knifed off your legs in my head.

It's out of love. 

I'll love you forever,

Megan

October 30, 2014

Hi sweetie,

It's a normal morning on the day before Halloween. You're at a skills fair at work, Damen is at school, Kian is napping, and Rylee is digging in the backyard. I am losing my shit while doing the dishes.

We've been back and forth this morning. You're annoyed at me for being crazy.

I'm trying my best to lock this shit in my head and not let it effect you or the kids. I haven't done the best job of that so far, but it is only 9:30. 

Starting right now, I'm taking control of my brain and coming back down to earth. My grief will not ruin this holiday, and I'm so sorry that it's run this past week straight to hell. 

You don't deserve it. You shouldn't have to put up with it.

I love you, please forgive my crazy. 

July 28th, 2015

Hello my bb,

We're in a house, our kids are fed and clean, we have things not everyone is privileged to have, and we are happy. Truly happy.

And that is because of you. 

Sure we may be behind a little on money, and things are tight now.. It doesn't matter. 

We will always come out on the other side. 

You make me feel like I can do anything, just by being with you. 

You are a super hero. You're the kids super hero. You are my super hero. 

I love you,

Megan

May 1, 2015

Standing in front of oblivion unphased; your hand in mine. 

Next to you I am fearless. 

Facing the blackness, I am steadfast 

in your arms. 

Bring the devastation, 

We will overcome. 

Evolution

You are my sunshine, my only-

And every breath. 

Each part of you rips me open, constantly forcing rearranging; 

Blossoming into something I hadn't known. 

I am still myself, but with ghosts of you.

Hints here and there of,

Pushing and pulling between two worlds.

Evolving.

When you're inside me,

Taking me places God couldn't create.

Together, everything is just at our fingertips.

Yours, which comfort and destroy- level and construct.

Here we've been, thousands of years, and intertwined, for the rest of eternity.